Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Three Stooges

the three STOOGES

I’ve been digging through pictures of Dennis' childhood for his 30th birthday party and just had to share this one...

That would be Dennis in the middle with kid brother, Nathan, and sister, Danielle.  Needless to say the practice paid off.

Couch Potatoes!

Couch Potatoes!

I just realized I didn’t snap one single picture over the weekend!  What is wrong with me?  Don’t answer that.  I’ve been having a minor back issue which is keeping me from the normal routine around here.  I just have to share these two pics I took this morning real quick before I go super glue the Oreck to my hand.  As I was trying to accomplish a couple of things on my to-do this this morning I heard the boys up to something in the other room.  I found them like this...

They really are becoming the best of friends and it makes my heart smile.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

First Day of Summer...

First Day of Summer Spring!
Early bloomin’ flowers?  Check.
87°?  Check.
Flushed cheeks from the heat?  Check.
Sprinkler to cool off?  Check.
Popsicles just because?  Check.
It’s the middle of March, right??

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Who Wants a Flapjack??

Who Wants a Flapjack?!

It’s that time of year again... when the family comes out to support Dennis and his fellow lions by gorging themselves on flapjacks and sausages.  This has become a bit of a tradition.  Our family and friends join us each year to help the organization have a successful event, although what they don’t know is that we are easily eating more than our $5 a ticket worth of food.  It’s so fun to watch the boys eat so many sausages you would think they would actually turn into one!  It’s very enjoyable to watch Dennis walk around serving coffee to other patrons as I secretly dream of him wearing an apron serving me coffee at home.  Super crazy to watch Chris and Jane fill out a body’s length of  50/50 raffle tickets just to find out an hour later that they have won for the second time in three years.  Unbelievable.  That’s all I’ve got to say about that.

Thanks to everyone who joined Dennis in supporting the Darien Lions Club!  We’ll see you next year.  Same place.  Same time.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Taking Advantage

Taking advantage.

Today is March 14th, and it’s 80°.  This is gonna be quick because I’m headin’ back outside.  We took advantage of Mother Nature’s amazing March weather and spent the morning at the zoo.  The boys spent the majority of their time with their noses pressed up against fences staring at whatever animal was fifty yards away.  Sure beats being at home with their noses pressed up against the sliding glass door begging to go outside, but can’t because it’s too cold.

Oh, and Auntie Pup joined us because she is home on spring break.  Just an added bonus!

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Kick Cancer's Ass

Kick Cancer’s Ass
- Girls Night Out -

Earlier this year we were told that a dear friend, so dear that we actually call her family, had been diagnosed with cancer at the age of 24.  Last night we celebrated the battle she is about to take on fighting ALCL (Anaplastic Large-Cell Lymphoma).  It was a wonderful evening, celebrating a wonderful young woman and her stronger than strong family.

Erica, we are so very proud of you and your unbelievable perspective seems to be keeping everyone else together.  You really are just amazing- we can all learn something from you.  Thank you for bringing us all together for what was a memorable  evening!  Now, GO KICK CANCER'S ASS!!

I wanted to share with Erica and her family some words that have gotten me through some of my toughest times, words that probably cross my mind every single day- so I put a couple of little signs together.  As simple as these words are they leave footprints.  She can, and she will do hard things.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

March Madness

March Madness

March has always been a crazy month for my family.  Birthdays and celebrations galore.  It seems like we are eating birthday cake throughout the entire month- because we actually are.  So, this morning the boys did a little birthday card painting to send to every special person celebrating a birthday in March.  That’s a lot of washable paint (and it was everywhere).  They really love the art center Santa made them for Christmas that sits in the nook between the kitchen and den.  It’s maybe the best (and cheapest) thing Santa has ever brought into our home.  Not to mention, thank you Land of Nod for the crafting aprons that have without a doubt saved me hundreds of dollars in ruined clothing.  I got them at the outlet for $2.50 a piece.  What a steal!!  

We would like to wish all of our March birthdays a year full of amazing moments, laughter and love.  We love each of you so very much!! 
A Happy, Happy Birthday to:
Auntie Abby
Auntie Pup
Great-Auntie Pam
Great Gramma
Great-Auntie Debbie Kain
Great Pops
Great Uncle Bobby
Cousin Tyler
Auntie Meg
And, a Happy Anniversary to Great Nana and Great Pops!!

Today happens to be Auntie Pup’s birthday and the boys left her a couple of video messages that I couldn’t help but log here on our blog.  I can’t wait to show them these!

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Welcome, Spring 2012!

Welcome, Spring 2012!

It’s 62° here in the suburbs and we are taking full advantage of it.  While I was picking up some sticks and pulling up a few things in the garden the boys took it upon themselves to open the sandbox for the season. 

We’ve spent every minute of our morning outdoors today- morning snack and lunch were both done picnic style!  We are so very tired of looking at the four walls of our house.

I’m so bored in fact that I’m redecorating our sitting room.  We sold our old sectional and now I’m on the hunt for the perfect chair and a half that looks like it came from Pottery Barn with the Ikea price tag.  Out with the old, in with the new- my motto for this spring!  More on that later.
All we can say is WELCOME, SPRING 2012!  I'm headin' back outside so I can get in a few hours of work while the munchkins nap.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Rainbow Bath.

The boys prefer their baths to be in a rainbow of colors.  Thank you, Crayola, for your amazing Bath Dropz that don’t stain anything!

Trust me, do yourself a favor.  Go to Target and pick these babies up for less than $5.00 and watch your kiddos have fun mixing colors in the tub.  They are in the hygiene section and not the baby section (which would make more sense).

Current News and Events

Current News & Events

I’m crazy.  I like to refer to my craziness as “My Disease”.  This week I decided that we were going to sell all of our couches, “borrow” a leather loveseat and chair and a half from my in-laws to put in our family room and purchase new furniture for our sitting room.  Of course, after I sell our two couches, and I’m sitting in an empty room I decide that the room needs to be painted.  Ok, so I fill Dennis in on my plans, which he isn’t happy about because I don’t know when to stop.  Off to Home Depot I went to hunt for the perfect neutral.  Oh, and I just ordered swatches of fabric to test new drape options for our sitting room which wasn’t part of the original plan either.  Anyway, to make a long story short- I’m crazy.  My kids are taking the news changes a little hard and by hard I mean falling hard, because they are used to super soft microfiber couches not slippery leather, reclining furniture.  You’ll see what I mean in a sec.  We do love how the “new” furniture looks in the sitting room, more cozy and the kids love snuggling up on it.  But, I’m dealing with an overload of brown and it sends me into convulsions.  This is just the beginning of a long, long journey to the perfect adult living space (no more toys, no more toys) in our sitting room.

Michael loves curling up with a good book on the “new” chair and a half.

The boys prefer to sit next to each other on the love seat.  
And, by next to I mean they must be touching at all times.

Please be aware that what I'm about to show you is, well, terrible.  I warned you.  This is what William looked like after he attempted to balance on the reclining foot rest of the "new" furniture.  
He's lucky he still has an eye.

To make matters worse, Michael fell fives minutes after William doing the exact same thing and he, too, was awarded a black eye for his efforts.  His isn’t nearly as bad as William’s.  You can’t even see it when he smiles.  But, my boys do have matching black eyes at the moment.  

One just can’t do anything without the other these days.

Friday, March 2, 2012

One Month Ago...

One Month Ago...

One month ago I was pregnant.  One month ago I went in to see my OBGYN because I felt strange.  One month ago I was told there was no heartbeat.  One month ago my world changed.  
The truth is I knew something was wrong from the beginning.  We had been trying for four months.  Four months of trying to create who was to be our third perfect child.  Four months of disappointment whenever I started a period.  Four months of telling myself it will happen when it’s supposed to happen.  Ugh, four months.  And, then the day came and my period didn’t.  A quick stop at the drug store.  Two trips to the bathroom.  I was elated.  We were elated.  
The planning started.  I can’t help it.  It just happens.  I think it’s a defect.  I pictured how to arrange three carseats in my SUV.  The color of the nursery walls.  The giggles between what could have been three brothers.  How the boys would protect a baby sister.  You know the planning.  The dreaming that takes place when you’re awake.  
Two weeks after our positive tests I started spotting.  Not bad spotting.  The spotting that I had with both boys.  The spotting that stopped with both boys.  This spotting didn’t stop.  I saw my doctors.  Our first ultrasound was scheduled.  I saw a heartbeat at five weeks.  A tiny (huge sigh of relief) heartbeat.  But, this ultrasound was different.  A large subchorionic hematoma surrounded 90% of the embryo.  I left with the words of my doctor pounding in my head.  “Try and stay pregnant.”  Try?  Ok, well, I’ll do my best.  
What was I supposed to do?  Not play with my kids.  Not pick them up when they wanted a hug.  Not pick them up to put them in bed or on the potty.  Lay around all day with my feet up?  I don’t lay around.  I just don’t.  Big things are happening in our house these days.  So, I went about my life as I normally would.  Being a mom to two active boys.  We told no one but a handful of people we were pregnant.  We told no one because I felt strange.  I had doubts.
Two weeks after my first ultrasound I went back to my doctor.  The bleeding hadn’t stopped.  In fact it had gotten worse.  Again, a wonderful heartbeat.  A strong heartbeat.  The hematoma was getting smaller.  40% in fact.  I was told the bleeding was from the hematoma resolving itself and that the bleeding should subside.  I left with the words of my doctor pounding in my head again.  “95% of babies after 7 weeks with a heartbeat go full term.”  Relief?  Sure.  Some.  But, it didn’t last long.  I was reminded with every trip to the bathroom that something wasn’t as it should be.  I scheduled another ultrasound for five weeks out.  I would be 12 weeks along.
At nine weeks I passed two clots.  Small, the size of dimes.  But, they were clots.  I felt funny.  I wasn’t nauseous.  I was losing weight.  I had very localized cramping on my lower right side, right were the hematoma was located.  I called my doctor and made them squeeze me in.  Something wasn’t right.  
As the ultrasound machine warmed up I kept telling myself there was going to be a heartbeat.  There had to be a heartbeat.  I’m not supposed to have a miscarriage.  The second the doctor located our baby I knew.  I’ve had enough ultrasounds to know exactly what they are supposed to look like.  There was no heartbeat.  I said it before the doctor did.  That, that was the moment that will forever be burned into my memory.  I sat there staring at our baby that wasn’t a baby anymore.  A teeny tiny human being that had slipped away from us days before I was told.  There was fluid build up, the beginning of an infection.  I scheduled my D and C after three more ultrasounds to confirm our life changing news.  
The next day I wasn’t pregnant anymore.   
I’m struggling.  What to do with the plans?  The plans that flooded every single possible second of free time.  The names we had picked out.  The ultrasound pictures of our third child.  The few items I had bought on sale to get a jumpstart on this baby’s closet.  The dreams I had of the three of them in our backyard.  The juggling three kids under three- by the time I was 30.  What do you do with the plans?  My plans haunt me now.  
I wasn’t going to write this but the truth is I was pissed.  I was pissed that this happened.  I was pissed that I marked every week out on my calendar and that I made all of these plans.  I was pissed that this teeny tiny human being would never be held.  Drool all over my shirt.  Throw up in my face.  Get grass stains on new clothes.  Get rocked to sleep.  Kiss their big brothers.  Wrestle with Daddy.  Feel the sun.  Be a part of our incredible family.  This isn’t supposed to happen, right?  Not to me it wasn't.  
A month ago I was pregnant.  Five minutes ago I took a birth control pill.  What a difference a month can make.
Now I’m faced with planning.  More planning.  But, this time it’s planning that I do not want to partake in.  When can I get pregnant again?  When should we get pregnant again?  Do I want to get pregnant again?  Planning sucks.
Two weeks post-op there I was.  Sitting in the exact same room where the planning stopped.  When I last knew that I was still pregnant.  It took my breath away.
Yesterday was a hard day.  I don’t know why, it just was.  Each day gets easier- except for yesterday.  I don’t blame myself anymore.  I did.  I know I shouldn’t have, but I did.  That just happens, too, much like the planning.  Each day I’m reminded that life goes on, as hard as it may be.  It just continues.
Why don’t women talk about this more?  I mean COME ON!  The numbers are staggering.  Thirty percent?  I thought my doctor was joking when he told me 30% of women miscarry.  Not me.  I wasn’t supposed to miscarry.  I was supposed to have a normal pregnancy full of nausea and vomiting, aches and pains from chasing my two toddlers around, and cankles.  I wasn’t supposed to miscarry.  I did.
My life is wonderful.  I look at my two boys and my phenomenal husband and know that my life is wonderful.
It’s just that some things don’t go as planned.